red-headed stepchild in the house of love (djmermaid) wrote,
red-headed stepchild in the house of love

sunday morning musings (Lush gig, crazy person)

so I'm up early (stop yr snickering, it's before noon as I'm writing this). here is a little peek at what's been up with me.

yesterday I had a mobile gig spinning for Lush, a very nice skincare line with a focus on healthy, quality ingredients and using as little packaging as possible. I believe they recently went to 100% POST-CONSUMER recycled in their (already minimal) packaging, which is freakin' AWESOME.

I totally respect the Lush commitment to reducing packaging and to recycling and using recycled materials as much as possible. it's good stuff too (oh my skin is soft right now, and wonderfully fragrant). and honestly the only way I can afford to shop there is when they hire me (I work for them for trade) so it's lovely all the way around. :-)

this was not a "dance" event - it was an in-store anniversary party, so they wanted a variety of nice, fun party music, which is a bill I can fill with confidence. I spun for nearly 5 hours. my favorite moment was when I played "(Every Time I Turn Around) Back in Love Again" and a mom who had been in the store for some time started dancing as she was in the checkout line... the kids got into the act and the entire family (bags in hand) danced out the door and onto the sidewalk outside, grinning and waving their hands in the air! it was AWESOME! DISCO FTW!!!

sometimes I really have to wonder where some of these folks come from, what their reality is (and where the money comes from) that they can shop in high-end retail (ok it's not Borghese, but still, Bay Street is *fancy*) during this sucky economy. but, God Bless 'em for doing it! it keeps the rest of us employed!

I've worked retail before, and besides being on yr feet all day and having to work damn near every weekend, there is the whole "serving people" thing (which can be fun, if they are nice about it) but there is also the dynamic of "can't afford to shop where you work" - which no one who works retail can, without a generous employee discount). it's rather bizarre. but hey, they sell quality products, and they seem to have a steady stream of customers. I'm just grateful they like my music. mermaids love to feel soft and smell nice! ;-)

on the way in, I had an INSANE encounter with a member of the public. Bay Street is laid out in a rather unique way, with a small street going past a number of boutiquey retail shops. traffic is always congested on this street as people stop to drop off or pick up others, or vie for an incredibly limited amount of parking, despite there being big parkades on each end of the complex. I'm forced to go down this street in order to drop off the coffin (oh, to someday spin this sort of gig on the lappertron!) and it is always a hassle. yesterday was no exception.

so I turn onto the street and crawl along, until my lane just stops. I wait. and wait. there are two cars in front of me, and nothing in front of the first car. so eventually, I tap my horn. the car in front of me hits its horn, and the first car does nothing. (probably looking for street level parking, which I think is free although I have never gotten it.) eventually the middle car gets disgusted and goes around the slowpoke.

nothing happens. so, I tap my horn again. car moves up a foot or two, then obstinately stops - not pulled to the side, mind you, right in the middle of the street! so I wait for a break in the oncoming lane and go around, flipping the driver off for being so selfish. next block is Lush, so I pull close to the parked cars, click on my hazards, open the back of the van and quickly transfer my CDJ coffin and a case of CDs into the store (one load) and come running back out. slowpoke car is *LEANING* on the horn now. I get back in the van and proceed down the street, finally winding my way around into parking.

as I'm sticking quarters into the meter, a car pulls up and someone yells "Do you have something to say to me?!"

I ignore it and continue shoving quarters in the meter. the query is repeated, so I say "no" and keep plugging the meter (parking is stupid expensive at this place... if they have me back I might try to coordinate just being dropped off next time). next thing I know, this person (dressed in tacky church lady style, in her late 40s or early 50s, and VERY ANGRY) has now parked her car and is coming up to me in person to yell at me for flipping her off.

it gets worse from there - she threatened to "beat [my] head in" and "kick [my] ass". well ok first of all you are already in legally actionable territory, making threats of physical violence. more importantly, I am on my way to work. gotta go!

I tried to respond minimally and just get away. walking (quickly!) through the deserted garage I made a beeline for the door, which swung open just as I was approaching. two high school girls in skinny jeans were in the doorway. "excuse me!" I said, and ducked under the arm of the one holding the door open, slowing down the attacker (yay video game strategy - get something between you).

so as I'm walking quickly down the hall, she gets through and continues to harangue me. I happen to notice that tacky angry church lady has cheap looking *orange kitten heel slings* on her feet. obviously she hadn't planned on tangling with a NINJA when she left the house!

she continues to rant and chase me in the deserted parking garage back halls, so I pick up my feet (in my practical Keens maryjane style treaded flats) and start to run. I knew once I made it through the double doors out to the street front that I'd be ok - with all the people around surely she would not follow through with physically assaulting me as she was threatening to do.

"WHY ARE YOU RUNNING?!" she shrieked.

"Late to work!" I replied.


I should have said, "why are YOU chasing me?" but instead I said the first thing I thought: "trying to get away from a crazy bitch!" over my shoulder, and just kept running.

there was no way she was going to catch me in those shoes, but I was scared anyhow! Teh Crazy, you just never know what it will do!

I finally popped through the double doors to the relative safety of the crowded sidewalk (this place is also usually crawling with security), and crossed the street to my destination. my friends at Lush saw I was a little freaked out, asked me what was going on and helped talk me down. I certainly didn't need the energy drink I'd brought after that! %-)

holy crap, I can't remember the last time I actually RAN AWAY from someone! the '80s?! yeah, I think it might have been.

so, the Lushies are awesome to a one and I quickly felt much better. but seriously, I was nearly beaten up in a fucking parking garage in broad daylight! WTF PEOPLE?!

after that, all I had to do was spin for 4 or 5 hours. dude, I can do that! :-D I played an eclectic mix that spanned decades and styles but all flowed together. it was a lot of fun!

so now I am safe at home, after a lovely chill evening with my bunny, enjoying my velvety skin and a lovely cup of tea. so I guess it was worth it... but really WTF?

I was actually nervous about going back to my car. it had occurred to me partway through my set that she might have keyed it (or worse) but I guess she just drove away. WHEW. like seriously, you are SO UPSET by being flipped off in traffic (and for pulling a jackass move - it's not like our cars ever touched) that you have to stop, follow me through the incredibly circuitous route into the garage, and then actually get out and threaten me?! YIKES!

teh crazy, Do Not Want. seriously, how long have you been driving that you can't tolerate being flipped off?

but other than that, it was actually a good day. spinning always lifts my spirits and the crew at Bay Street Lush is made of awesome. also I must tip my headphones to my womderful Bunny Jovino who made sure I was fed and squared away (he loaded up teh van for me) and then stayed home and made ad banners and did dishes while I was out DJing. <3!

so today I have a lovely dinner (with sweet friends) planned. I'm drinking hot tea and just may go into the hot tub (I'll have to rinse off and remoisturize but that'll be a pleasure with my bag of goodies!)

thanks for reading. ;-)
Tags: ack, awesome, bitch, car, craptastic, disco, dj, driving, dumb, freakout, fsck, living well is the best revenge, meh, mthrfkr, musics, o noes, omg, stress, ugh, w/e, win, work, yay, you've got to be kidding me

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