January 31st, 2007

sewwious goggles

sad times for us - losing a friend

so... this sucks.

sad times here in the house of bunnies.

yesterday was the last day on earth of jovino's beloved tuxedo cat, 4. she was an elderly lady who had not in the best of health for some time, but we'd been treating her thyroid problem, and doing our best to pamper her as her energy and health level varied from week to week and day to day.

yesterday it became clear that the end was near. it was heartbreaking for me to see her and Jovino saying goodbye, and even moreso, to see her in such sad shape.

the only comfort in the situation comes from knowing that we cared for her as best we could, and remembering her last days here on earth. with the arrival of the kittens we'd both been making a point of spending time with just her (the two of us together, and also individually.) I'd been slipping her extra Greenies (her very favorite treat) whenever we were both in the kitchen without the littles around. and I took pains to ensure that they did not hassle her. you know how boisterous kittens can be.

for the past couple of nights, she'd slept in Jovino's bed, and monday night I happened to fall asleep on the couch with the littles curled up on my lap after watching one of my favorite movies (Paris is Burning). the result of this was that 4 had Jovino all to herself all night for her last night on earth, and they slept in his bed together. I am sure she appreciated having that time with him. I was glad to know that my sleepiness had given them this extra time together.

4 was a total sweetheart, and she and Jovino loved each other very much. she also clearly liked me and appreciated the kindness and care I gave her. she wasn't even mad at me for bringing kittens into the house, and had accepted them and even interacted with them some (though their energy level was vastly different than hers, so it's not like they palled around. but she and Ninjai clearly actually liked each other, and while Bruce was sometimes scared of her, 4 was never hostile or menacing to the littles.)

I will miss her meowing (she was very vocal) and her sweet face and friendly habit of sitting on my lap as I checked email, and seeing her curled prettily up in a box of fleece scraps as we worked in our sewing workshop.

I also know that she'd been feeling poorly lately, and when Jovino called me to come into his room to see her, it was clear she was near the end. we agonized over what to do, but ultimately I think that easing her transition from this life was the kindest thing, though we were both in tears at the vet.

While we were waiting for the vet to prepare the injection, Jovino had to leave the room briefly so I stayed with her, holding her and speaking softly to her. I also gave her a bit of reiki, and I saw her breathing deepen a bit and become more calm as I did so. It was all I could do, but it did seem to help. I was grateful to be able to comfort her a bit and have a last moment with her.

I didn't have the pleasure of knowing sweet Miss 4 anywhere near as long as Jovino did, but she'd long ago crept into my heart. I certainly loved her, and miss her now.
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