Last night I took a dance class, for the first time in a long time.  It was both a joyful and a humiliating experience.  See, I am in Basics 1... again.  I know what I *should* be doing, but the actual doing of it was a challenge, as often as not.  It REALLY helps that I remember the concepts, so all I'm doing ("all") is conditioning and drilling.  I have not lost it ALL - just most of the physical side.

It was depressing to see myself in the mirror.  I want a waist again!  It was fun dancing with the other dancers though.  And kinda cool that I am now the "more experienced" dancer who understands how to trade the lead, and can help the newest beginners (not like I am teaching, but just by dancing together, you learn a lot.)  I totally remember taking classes up at the studio on Church street with the fabulous windows, being partnered with dancers who had a lot more experience than me... not only did I learn from them, but it somehow helped me dance better in the moment too.  Hopefully my experience will be helpful to the newbie dancers as I learned from the experienced dancers when I was starting out.

My teacher is a dear friend, and someone who started taking classes around the same time as me, back in 1996.  She's now a professional dancer and instructor, who has taught both locally and internationally.  And I am in her basics 1 class - where I clearly belong.  Why oh why did I let it go?  (She says "you had a life!" but what I mostly had was a MESS.)

Today, I am feeling it.  I'm not sore, but I am definitely feeling it - in the obliques (from taxim), shoulders (from holding my arms up) and oddly enough the soles of my feet are a bit sore - I didn't expect that, since I am on my feet all day cutting, but I usually wear shoes with some support, not the flat little ballet slippers I wear to class.  (I used to dance barefoot, but after picking up a painful plantar "wart" (its really more like a hole in the sole) from a dance studio, I stick to the ballet slippers now - a bonus is my feet don't get so cold, and they slide well for turns, yet grip when necessary too.)

Well, the journey of a thousand miles starts with the first step.  And I certainly feel there are miles and miles ahead of me.  I HAVE to get it back, though!  How could I let myself lose this - something I love so much?  I could cry if I think about it too much.  I actually did feel myself start to get a bit teary during warmups, when a certain song I know and love and remember well came on... it is a group of women singing, very folkloric, slow and beautiful - it ends with them making "whinny" sounds.  I don't know if I have this one, will have to dig around in my middle eastern CDs.  But it is used in FCBD's classes a lot.

Today, I have a lot of work to do... tomorrow I'm going to either do yoga at home (from a video) or perhaps the new Rachel Brice arms dvd.  I am DETERMINED to get there!  And I have a deadline - in May is a bellydance festival that I'll be attending with my good friend Lane, and taking some classes there.  So, I'm training.

Wish me luck!