I'm frantically preparing... screening tracks, doing my hair, picking out my warmest, pinkest, most fabulous outfit! (Unfortunately this one kinda snuck up on me and I had no chance to book my fabulous waxer to update my eyebrows - so it's either do it myself or rock the sasquatch look - I'm sure you can guess what I (ow!) chose(oww!)
I have to say that love this, I really do. Especially that I get to play DISCO!!!
Ever since The Best Pink Saturday EVAR (you know the one, back in I think 2004, when I got to go on until after 1:40 and people SCREAMED for the cops to let me continue...) I have been given a few new restrictions from my gracious hosts, the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence. Specifically: I am required to end on time (at midnight - no more going until the cops come around to stop me.) I am also required to "bring it down" for the last hour and play music that is more chill.
Last year, I dutifully complied - and to my surprise, dropping the tempo in no way affected the energy level! So this year I plan to take full advantage of this experience, and make my last hour (from 11pm until midnight) the equivalent of "7 am at the Troc" - in 1978! :-D Wish me LUCK!!!!
Bobby sent my CDs express mail as a special favor to me (because of Pink Saturday) and I am totally stoked to drop some of his remixes from back-in-the-day!
In other news, there has been a lot of backchannel stuff going on with me. I'd like to blog about it more, but haven't had the time. The Problematic Ex situation has pretty much settled, and I can at least be relieved that he so far hasn't attempted to interact with me. I've been steadily deleting old photos that he's in, so as not to have to see him flash across my computer screen. Every time I delete one, I feel a barely preceptible lightening of the weight of the past. I'm almost done with this and then I never have to look at him again.
It's kinda weird - I have never had a relationship go so badly that I wanted to get rid of photos. I still have a lot of old photos from when I was with Peter, which are enjoyable to me. But then again he has never tried to fuck me over. Even when things were difficult and we were splitting up, we always treated each other fairly and ethically.
I've also delved back into my old LJ entries, and that has been interesting... to say the least. I'm removing the Problematic Ex's proper name from my old entries. This is going to take a while. Jovino asked me if I was "rewriting the past" - my response was, I am describing the past using different terms. Considering all of the memories that came welling up as I read "between the lines" of all my old entries, I think this is fair. At the time I saw my life as I wanted to - through impossibly rose-colored glasses. It's almost as if I was hoping to shape reality to fit my hopes by describing it as I wished it was. Ugh. No more of THAT!
What I saw from reading these old entries was that the troubles in that relationship started a <i>long</i> time before I ever realized it, and they only intensified as things went on. In fact, all of the early challenges grew into full-blown "issues" (none of which were we ever able to resolve, tellingly.) I did a lot of sweeping-things-under-the-rug in those times, and often the realization of what I was doing never quite broke the surface of my consciousness. It's really rather eerie to look back now. I'll see a chirpy post about some party or other, which emphasizes the best parts and totally fails to mention how I had to deal with (or manouver around) some snit that the Problematic Ex was in all night (f'rexample.)
Ah, hindsight. It's always 20/20, natch!
Well, back to my preparations for Pink Saturday! If you're in SF this evening, why not come say Hi? I'm spinning starting at 7pm (at BofA, 18th and Castro - right where they always set up the xmas tree!) and going until midnight. Jovino will also be taking a set during this time - not yet sure when. Come on down, say hi, drink champagne with us!
Celebrate being who you are and loving who you love! Believe me, the world needs MORE of this!!