red-headed stepchild in the house of love (djmermaid) wrote,
red-headed stepchild in the house of love
djmermaid

  • Mood:

omgwtf

so I'm taking a couple of classes at our local community college. in many ways, they're great - the instructor is knowledgeable, interactive, and really seems to care about us learning what he is presenting. we are getting more than our money's worth for the tuition, for sure.

in another way, the classes are driving me nuts. I'm just not adept at this stuff, and it is intensely frustrating for me to struggle, week after week, and always only partly succeed. I do actually get the core concepts, but I'm just not that great at he execution.

I want to pack it in and quit, but then I don't want to. I don't want to give up. at the same time, I'm tired of sucking and turning in substandard work.

we're nearly halfway through the semester now. I'm doing my best to stick it out, but sometimes I want to scream, cry, or both.

DJing this weekend was a wonderful break - it was such a joy (and a relief) to get to do something I'm actually good at, instead of beating my head against this fucking brick wall.

ah well. back to the brick wall - I need to finish up my homework so I can get to bed. tomorrow morning is closer than I'd like to admit.
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